That one call

At some point during the second to last call of the evening I was reminded that the people I talk to are in fact human. And that I am as well. The caller was a woman whose son had just been put in jail (what for I don't know and it's no concern of mine) and needed to figure out how her son could get in contact with her. This is a fairly common question and I've got the info bookmarked.

However, this poor woman really just needed someone talk to I think. Halfway through the call she started crying and for once this person on the other end was someone I just wanted to reach through the phone and hug. She wasn't crying to get something, she wasn't crying because her call forwarding wasn't working, she was crying because her son was in jail and she was scared and alone. And for once I think I handled it ok. I told her that I'd give her a tissue if I were there and to take her time when she apologized for crying and that I'm a voice and an ear right now

Tonight when I ended that call I said something I rarely say to a customer. I told this lady to take care of herself and to be strong. And you know, she thanked me for my kind words. Perhaps appropriately, those are the kinds of calls I remember.

I hope both she and her son make it through this.

Night shots

finger rock
Originally uploaded by surly monkey

The living room is pretty much empty, I'm typing this out with my computer one a tomato box that is serving as the coffee table. Across the room is a frame print of this photo leaning against the cabinet the guinea pig cage is on. Hopefully, we'll have everything out of here tomorrow and can clean the next day.

I've spent a fair part of the evening looking at this photo. It's perhaps one of my favorites so far. This one was taken back in 2004, when I first started playing around with taking night shots. There were a few tries before I got this one and I had to wait for a car to come by to catch it. This particular car turned out to be a state trooper who turned around to make sure I wasn't a dead body on the side of the road.

There is something about taking photos at night that I seem to enjoy. I haven't done it in a while and I'm probably due to get out one night and get some night shots of this city. Truthfully I haven't taken a lot of photos here in the city. Of course another advantage to the new apartment is there is an awesome view to get some shots taken. Perhaps some night I'll catch the moon over Cheyenne Mountain.

Keep your phone

I've come to the conclusion that I feel bad for the customers of the company I work for. Or at least most of the ones I deal with, especially the ones that have phone service with us. People who have switched to our phone service have lost the phone number they've had for years, gone without phone service for weeks on end and lost features that they had with the old land line companies. Put it this way, if one needs a reliable hassle free land line phone, then one should stick with an actual land line company. If the home phone is just there for convience then digital phone is for you.

Of course, I'm sure it's not just the company I work for. I would guess that the other cable companies that are beginning to offer voice services are experiencing the same kind of issues. And only a small percentage of our customers do call in and I only talk to a small percentage of those callers.

Nonetheless, the crap we have to put some of these people through bothers me. I try as hard as I can to make it easier on them by getting the service back on as quickly as possible and guiding them how to properly navigate if they want to cancel with us.

Not that long ago I was enjoying my job but I'm getting back to the point where it's just tedious and once again I feel ineffectual. At some point it will get better or so I hope.

Sorry to bitch to much, but I really do feel bad for some of these people. And sometimes I think they can tell.

Brand old heavies

Sunday night I saw the Melvins for the first time. Until Sunday night I think the loudest band I'd ever seen was (believe it or not) Midnight Oil back in the early nineties. Currently the Melvins tour with Big Business, the core members of Big Business also serve as the Melvins bass player and second drummer. When you first look at the drum kits it looks like they've been fused together, with certain parts shared by both drummers. The mirror image effect is fairly apparent when watching the two drummers.

Big Business set was a nice somewhat brutal way to start the night off. Originally consisting of drummer Coady Willis and bassist Jared Warren, they seem to have added a guitar/noisemaker who I have no idea what his name is. He definitely helps round them out as far as guitar and added to the chaotic music that is Big Business. For a band that rocks so hard, they have a rather subdued presence on state, such as the guitar playing just staring off to the ceiling has he was playing these awesome riffs. Towards the end of the set Dale Crover (drummer for the Melvins) came out and played guitar with them for the last few songs.

Then then the Melvins came on. I'd say they stormed the stage but they sort of just ambled up to their spots and just started playing the first song. They pretty much didn't say anything and played a blistering set straight through to the end. I don't know what Buzz Osborne or Dale Crover's speaking voice sound like at all after seeing that show. Buzz came out wearing a camouflage robe and Jared nice floral print dress. Here again was another example of a band that freaking kills it and yet manages to stay pretty mellow when performing. They seemed to just get up there and play the set. The mirrored drum playing was just intense, those two drummers have some awe inspiring senses of timing. To stand there ant watch them play the twin set was just amazing, I really don't have many works for it.

It really was an awesome show. I was already a fan of both bands but after seeing the two together for the first time, I'm pretty much blown away. I will be going to see them again the next time they swing through.

Stuff, Boxes and Books

Currently the living room is filled with boxes and random pieces of furniture. The move is going to be next weekend so the staging has begun. Personally, I hate the actual act of moving. Carrying furniture is a pain and packing everything into boxes annoys me. Not that I've done much with the boxes other than find them. Much of my stuff is still in a boxes, with the exception of my clothes. Most of my possessions consists of books and music (in the form of CD and vinyl), and Phrank has boxed most of that stuff up.

Having said that, I do like getting into a new place even if this new one is pretty similar to the current one. The big differences are it comes with a fireplace, bigger living room and a balcony that is twice as big as the current one. And the biggest selling point for me is no more having to look at and hear the parking lot right outside. Our new view looks down on the courtyard and out towards NORAD/Cheyenne Mountain. Perhaps my chances of seeing UFOs will increase.

Phrank has been quite industrious this last week with painting furniture, sewing slip covers for both people and kitty furniture and making an awesome stereo table. So far the stereo table is the coolest in my opinion. And I've got a lot more records to score to fill out that thing, yeah the LPs fit under the table. Independent Records has this double LP by the Apples in Stereo that I've been eyeballing. I'll probably break down and buy it soon enough. Inevitably, I'm going to have to learn how to rip my records into some digital format. I know I need a certain kind of cable.

Wow, maybe I've stumbled onto a possible hobby. I've been trying to find one.

Snapping

For the first time in a work environment, I saw and heard someone completely lose it today. Shortly before I was supposed to log in to the phones there was a brief power outage that shut down all of the computers, lights and perhaps the phones. When the lights came back on we heard a lady from the next row start yelling "I can't take it anymore!" At first it sounded like she was kidding but we all quickly realized that she wasn't. This woman genuinely had a freak out. If she would have said something about going to strangle someone I think she would have been just sent to take a walk. Of course having said something like that she got pulled into a managers office and I think sent home early.

Coincidentally, there was a regional analyst on site today who was standing around us when this happened. I can understand where this lady is coming from (although I doubt if I'd snap like that, I'd probably tell my supe "I'm leaving for a bit, if you need to fire me then do so") and told the analyst as such.

It was probably good for him to see that even though it was sort of pathetic and ugly at the same time. We are under quite a bit of pressure and quite a few of us feel that the managers and higher up really have no inkling of that.

What would be awesome is if it caused marketing to slow down some of their pushing new sales and focus on the customers we already have.

I feel safe enough to go to work tomorrow, I doubt if she's going to show up with a shotgun or anything like that. And I do know that if I see some coming in with a firearm, I'm hitting the deck caller or no caller and getting the hell out. Getting shot at work is not the way I want to die. And I still have finger puppets to make.

Finger puppets

Work has become ridiculously busy again. The kind of busy like it was back when I started, people on hold for close to an hour and no end in sight. The shift I'm on is the first eight hour/five day a week shift I've had since I hit the floor here. Which means I now have two days off instead of three. Not having to be there for three days was quite nice and I think the busier it gets the more I'll miss having that extra day.

There is now a new team and due to the doubled call volume I don't even know the names of some of my team members. The guy that sits across from me is affable enough but he pretty much just talks about work. I don't always want to be reminded where I'm at when I'm sitting there. That's why I sit there and play with my phone and take stupid videos of my fingers (although when I watched it the first time, I started laughing in the middle of a call). I think I may make some finger puppets or something for work.

To put it mildly, between the new schedule and the dramatic increase in call volume, I have been really exhausted lately. Hence no entries. It was all I could do to not stay in bed my entire days off this weekend (or yes the couch). I didn't even have it in me to go skate.

And on that note, I'm going to bed

Around the corner

Sometime last weekend fall started making it's presence known. The temperature took a big dip for a couple of days, there was a cloud cover that just looked like fall and the smell of snow lightly tinged the air. The leaves haven't begun to change yet, although today I noticed that the green in some of the trees was starting to dull. Fall is going to be here before I know it and that means winter shortly after.

Fall has always been my favorite season, after the heat of summer the coolness is a welcome relief before the bitter cold of winter (I've never lived anywhere with a truly mild winter). Plus, growing up back east the colors were just spectacular. Colorado Springs does have some trees that aren't willows and aspens for a splash of non-indigenous colors outside of the yellow portion of the spectrum.

My hope is that I can get myself outside enough to enjoy the fall this year, and get some decent pictures. I don't exactly remember but I think I didn't really get out last fall.

Crumbling on U.S. 50

Sign outside abandoned building
Originally uploaded by surly monkey

There is something about abandoned buildings that catches my attention. It's hard to say what it is about the relics that attracts me. I suspect part of it is growing up in Indianapolis and seeing the decaying remains of the Rust Belt. There was this abandoned factory on the downtown side of the Kentucky Ave. bridge that I was alway curious about. One of the last times I was in Indy, I could barely find the bridge and that factory was long gone. There probably aren't that many abandoned buildings left in Indy anymore, with all of the revitalization that city has experienced since I left.

Some of this could have come from living in Muncie as well. That city was smack dab in the middle of the manufacturing decline in the U.S. Once one got away from campus and the residential neighborhoods, it'd be hard to throw a rock without hitting an abandoned factory.

It seems to me that these crumbling buildings have stories of their own. Stories about the people who built and work inside them. And in a way the ghosts of those people still inhabit these crumbling structures. Not in a "ooohhh a scary ghost" way but in the way the energy that people expended inside places like this still lingers in those bricks. There is a sense for me that our history is in buildings as well. It strikes me that at one time (not that long ago) factories were very much American cathedrals. They were at least built as lofty at times.

All I know is that when I see an abandoned and crumbling building, I want to remember it or at least take a photo of it.

Work stuff

Strangely the day I was going to turn in my resignation notice, I got two unexpected strokes. I had my mini performance review and I got an "outstanding" on it, which I was stoked on, the next one counts toward a raise. And later that day I was informed that I had been selected as employee of the month. I have know idea what criteria was used to select that and I'm already getting crap from some people about it. Of course, that was to be expected. the only real plus so far for employee of the month is a prime parking spot (I just open no one messes with the Surly Mayfly).

Like I said in an earlier post, even though this may be a crappy job, I sort of like it. Mostly because I feel like I'm pretty good at it and there can be a sense of accomplishment after getting someone back online. Fleeting as it may seem.

I still hope for the day when I can find work that requires no contact with customers at all. But I realize that those jobs can be hard to find in this day an age. But one can dream, can't they?

Of course I pick a schedule that isn't the greatest because I thought I'd only be there for a week of the new schedule. Hopefully this new schedule doesn't last almost six months like the last one did.

Plans were meant to be broken

Turns out I'm staying in Colorado Springs for the time being. Phrank and I came to a decision to try again the morning I was going to put in my notice. Talk about cutting it close. I'm happy with this change of plans. That's not to say I wasn't looking forward to moving back to Indiana. I was. But I want to see if we can't make this work (and there's always the possibility we could move there together).

Both of us have things that we each need to deal with to make this work. My own part is that I don't open up and I stand up for myself. I'm getting some help with that and I think lately I've been better at it. And I'm kind of boring when it comes to wanting to leave the house.

We also put in to get a different apartment, which among other things has a much better view (that doesn't include being directly above the parking lot), a fireplace and a much bigger living room. Phrank had sold the king bed while I was in Steamboat last weekend so today she bought a queen. I think a new place and a new bed might help with this whole starting over thing.

So it's kind of like we're starting a whole new chapter here. And I'm happy about that.

What I saw Tuesday morning

What I saw Tuesday morning
Originally uploaded by surly monkey

So my deskmate has decided to attempt to lightly prank me until the shift change in honor of my leaving.

The truth is it's pretty funny. Monday I came into work and my screen was covered with post-it notes with some bizarre smiley face drawn on them. Today I can in to a completely clean desk (and I have a messy desk, with papers strewn everywhere) and the screen protector pictured. And I have this sinking feeling I'm going to show up to work tomorrow to find my desk covered in some kind of tent-like structure.

As much as I dislike my job, I actually do kind of enjoy it. Or at least the people I work with. Currently, I'm on a really good team. When it is slow enough to actually speak to one another we all get along really well. And there is a lot of joking around and flipping of the bird. Now if we didn't have those pesky customers to deal with.

I may have mentioned this before but for as crappy as my job is, I'm actually good at it. And I do get a sense of satisfaction when I do get someone back online or get their phone working. As cheap of thrill that may be. I like the troubleshooting aspects of the job, the part I really don't like is how were supposed to hold the hand of the customers and having to apologize on every call.

It gotten to the point that I'm thinking I'm going to consider looking for the same type of work when I get to Indiana (yes, I'm sticking with my plan). Although hopefully without the digital phone. That's just a pain in the ass. I might even start naming names when I finally quit.

King of carrot flowers

It must be pretty easy to throw me for a loop, because I keep getting thrown for one. Right before I got on the phones today, I got a call that had me thinking all day about whether or not to change my plans. And now I'm not exactly sure where I'm at now and what is the best for me. And at this point doing what is best for me has to be the most important thing. For too long I've neglected to take care of myself and it's high time to start.

What the best for me is hard for me to figure out sometimes. I'm just not used to thinking about it. the flipside of this is I probably come across of not caring about other people so much. There is probably a correlation here. One of those take care of yourself first then care for others kind of things or something. I do know that my first impulse is not always the best thing for me, which is why I find myself biting my tongue quite a bit.

I find myself torn between a fantasy of what could be and what is more likely the truth (whatever that it is (stupid postmodern world)). Of course, nobody but Nostradamus can predict the future (and he's been dead for a while). So I can't really say what would happen in the future. And that brings it all back to making these decisions based on what I think and feel is best for me. So that's what I've got to do.

Back in the 2nd home again

Tonight I'm in Steamboat and somewhat wondering what drove my decision not to come back here. But I know exactly why. As much as I loved it here, I know that if I were to come back I would just stagnate like I was when I was here. The truth is, while I was here I was stuck in my twenties, even though I am well into my thirties (and slightly approaching forty). I'm ready to move on from that.

There are a lot of aspects that I'm going to miss about this place. I have some deep roots here that I could return to if I wanted. But it is time to move on. And I already miss the views. I'd almost forgotten just how awesome they really were.

The good news is that someday I'll be able to come back here for a vacation once in a while. And there will always be someone here who has a couch that I can crash on.

Closer

The last couple of weekends have been spent traveling around trying to get my goodbyes in. I'm starting to get this sinking feeling that I'm not going to get everyone in that I want to.

I guess that's probably the way it works. You always miss someone. Goodbyes aren't my strong suit to begin with. and this time around I don't know if I'll be seeing some of these people ever again.

Although I was able to pull the surprise show for the Plagarists show last weekend. And they were surprised, thankfully everyone kept the secret.

It's all starting to become real, that I am in fact leaving Colorado. The stack of boxes in my room is further proof if this.

The funny thing is, right now my coworkers are jealous that I'm quitting, even though I'll be unemployed. Geez, I think that place is starting to suck even more (I didn't even really notice).

Looking back

As the time for me to head back to Indiana draws nearer, I find myself thinking about and attempting to reconnect with my past. Part of this is just the act of going around the state and trying to find those who have had an impact or otherwise played a part in getting me to this point in my life. I also have found myself contact those in Indiana (and elsewhere) that I've been out of touch with. Partially for selfish reasons, so I can have more people to hang out with when I get there. But there is another part and that is I may owe some of these people an apology. Mostly for just dropping out of sight and contact for however long it's been.

I'm not sure if I need to apologize for something like that but I do feel a twinge of guilt when I think about having just kind of disappeared all of those years ago.

There are also those that I delibertaly cut off contact with for whatever reasons sounded good to me at the time. Those are the ones I probably really do owe some kind of contrition too. I"m not sure what form it should take or if I even really need to do so after all of this time.

The only thing I know is that I can't change the past no matter how much I may want to. The only thing I can do is try to do the right thing in the now. I try not to worry so much about the past because of this but it's hard not to do sometimes.

I don't even know if I have regrets, and I don't know if even if I cuold if I would change anything about the past. It did make me what I am today after all.

Skunks (again I'm sure)

Sitting here with the screen door wide open I can smell the skunk that's been hanging around here for the couple of weeks. Something is setting off this critter almost every night (of course I'm not sure if it's the same one, it smells like the same one). My guess it would be a dog that sets the skunk off. Thankfully, where ever he sprayed wasn't that close to here but I feel sorry for the schmuck who owns that yard where he did spray.

There was a time when I had this thing for skunks. As in I was reading up about keeping skunks as pets and the like. I actually think they are fascinating creatures and oh so curious.

I've never been able to get a picture of one and honestly I'm a bit leery to do so. It seems the only time I see them are at night and I have this suspicion that the flash might just get me sprayed. I really don't want that to happen.

When I lived in the trailer park, in the summer I'd go outside to smoke and every night at about the same time there was a skunk that would makes his rounds from trailer to trailer and trash can to trash can. I really enjoyed watching that guy. The funny thing is, he would check me out every night and I'd alway just say hi to him. After that he'd move on and go about his business.

I'm not even sure if there are skunks in Indiana.

Geekery

Sometimes when there is time between calls at work I find myself clicking through digg, Which is a cross between a social networking and group bookmarking site. What happens is that I sometimes run across really cool stuff like Human Brain Cloud which is a multi-player free associations "game". It can be slightly addicting. Basically, it gives you a word or phrase and you type what comes to your mind first.

There's a part of me that misses when the Internet was new and exciting. Believe it or not there was a time when you could use the Internet with on web browser. I still remember when I figured out how I could email people outside of the Ball State Nodes (mostly to my brother down at IU). That was cool. Not to say I don't like what the Internet has become, that I can store as many photos as I want at Flickr is pretty freaking awesome. Or that Gmail has pretty much unlimited storage. That's cool as well. But there was a sense back in the day of a secret knowledge if you will. No you have to program to get that.

I think I just established that I'm a geek (actually I took a"How geek are you" quiz today and I got 61%). But whatever, someday it'll come in handy. You watch.

The view

This weekend will hopefully be the start of my going around this state and getting my goodbyes out. And hit the skate parks I've enjoyed over the years.

As much as I'm over Colorado, I will miss this state quite a bit. I don't think the scenery can really be beat here, and Indiana sure doesn't have quite the vistas and starkness that Colorado can have. When I first got here, it blew me away just how insignificant these mountains here can make one feel. I'd spent part of my summers as a kid in the mountains of Pennsylvania but that never prepared me for what I saw when I first got here. I still remember the first time I got a glimpse of the Rockie Mountains, I was on the Greyhound outside of Limon (I now think it was Pike's Peak that I saw, perhaps Long's). It was off in the distance but still amazing.

Indiana doesn't have those overwhelming views of natural scenery. Not to say there isn't natural beauty there. I've seen places in Indiana that are as beautiful and peaceful as Colorado. Just not on as immense of scale.

My point here? I don't know if I really have one. Other than I don't regret having spent a large chunk of my life so far here. And I'm not ruling coming back to Colorado but I doubt it will be a town that ends in Springs.

It's the end

About a week ago I had my first session with a psychologist. Even before these recent turn of events I was considering starting to see one. If it's not been obvious over the last few years, I suffer from depression. Up until I got back from vacation I thought I had it under control with medication but I wanted to get some other stuff going on in my head taken care of.

As with any health practitioner, the first meeting is mostly working up a profile. Questions about medical history and mental health history. What surprised me (and shouldn't have) were all the questions about suicide. The thing about that is, I'm not sure if I think about killing myself that much. Most of my thoughts of suicide are not thoughts of doing it but disembodied voices in my head saying "he killed himself". It's been years since I've even remotely considered killing myself (and my firearm is staying in the box it's packed away in). but that other line goes through my head quite a bit when I'm in a heightened emotional state like I am currently. I'm not sure I really get it.

There were some other interesting things the shrink said I might consider looking at inside myself. Such has the fact that there does seem to be a pattern to the women I tend to get involved with. He's not the first person to mention that either.

I'm just bummed that I'm only going to be able to get a few sessions in before I leave for Indiana and my health insurance ends.

Confusion

One of the things I've never figured out in life is to when to bite my tongue or not. I usually default to biting my tongue when when doubt. Lately, I've been doing a lot of tongue biting. And my tongue is really starting to hurt.

This situation that I'm in right now is one of those times where I can't decide whether spewing forth all the pent up anger and frustration at the person I'm feeling it toward id even worth bothering. What goes through my mind is this something I'm going to regret more for saying what's really on my mind or am I going to regret the fact that I said it? And I sure as hell can't answer that question right now.

The big question, are these feelings of anger and frustration even really directed at this other person or am I just pissed about my own inadequacies?

I'm not sure if my head is even screwed on straight these days. I'm told that I am the only person that can let people affect (or is it effect, I always get those two confused) the way I feel. I'm not sure if I buy that anymore. It kind of seems like a cop out for people to be crappy to other people.

Like I have any answers at this point in my life.

Live long and prosper.

Blah

Abandoned House, Trinadad CO
Originally uploaded by surly monkey

I hate it when I obsess about stuff I really have no control over. For the last two weeks, I've felt like I have little say or control in what's happening around me. I came back from a vacation in Indiana and my life turned upside down the night I got back. The simple non-detailed explanation is that the wedding is off and I'm moving back to Indiana alone. There is quite a bit more to it but that's it for now.

I'm left with a lot of anger that I don't exactly know how to channel. There's a host of other feelings, such as betrayal and loss.

I've accepted the situation for what it is. That doesn't mean I have to deny feeling like crap about what has happened and I have a right to what feelings I'm experiencing right now.

Someday maybe I can get the lessons I'm supposed to learn from this. Right now I've got no idea what I'm supposed to be learning from this. Other than starting over once again. At least this time I'll be around my family and some friends I've had for years.

Long time

Oh poor neglected blog, how you've waited patiently for me to type something into your text field. And what do I do? Go off and ignore you for at least three months. and yet every night there you are in my bookmark toolbar just waiting for me to click on you. You never deserved this, did you poor little blog?

I'm in one of those weird situations where I really want to write about what is going on with me but I'm not sure just how public I want to make things just yet. So I'll go with being as vague as possible.

I'm moving back to Indiana sometime in September. I don't have an exact date yet but the lease here is up on Sept. 30 and I'm leaving sometime before that date. For the time being, let's just say I've given up on Colorado. It's time to go back.
Which means it time for me to go around Colorado and say my farewells to all of those I've known for the last 13 years or so, at least the ones I can track down. Thankfully most of them are still in the same town.

No promises but I may be here a bit more often than I have been.

Oh yeah, those sunflowers are from the Ludlow Massacre site.

So it goes

R.I.P. Kurt Vonnegut.

I enjoyed your bitter coated sugar pills.

Thank you.

400 and evolution

According the the Blogger dashboard, this is post number 400. I don't really know if there is any real relevance to this but I just thought I'd mention it, if I were a real blogger I'd probably direct you to my Amazon wish list and say "buy me something". I'm not a real blogger.

This is an interesting map. It's a map of the where and to what degree evolution (as far as state standards) is being taught in the U.S. What I don't get is how in the hell my home state of Indiana is at the top of the heap when it comes to teaching evolution? Although I will admit that it seems I managed to get a pretty decent education out of my K-12 system back in Indiana. Of course, by this point in my life it's hard to remember what I learned then and what I've learned since then. I do distinctly remember learning about Eugene V. Debs in High School, and realizing after graduating that very few others knew about him. How the hell I even remember the name to this day is beyond me.

What strikes me as odd is that Indiana as a fairly well deserved reputation as a conservative state but unlike other fully conservative states, Indiana has these strange quirks. Like the evolution thing and that Hoosiers often tend to elect Democratic governors. Due to the industrialization of the north and central portions of the state there are also long, proud labor union traditions. Not mention that Indianapolis spat out Kurt Vonnegut who is the furthest thing from conservative.

Actually, when I think about it Colorado seems to have similar quirky tendencies. Maybe it's just that whole can't judge a book by it's cover thing.

Oh well.

My gimpy leg

For the first time in years I went to the doctor due to an injury. As I mentioned a few post back I fell trying to skate that ditch I cleaned out. It's still hurting and the pain hasn't seemed to lessen. So I made an appointment to get it checked out. Now I have to get an MRI (I've never had one of those, heck I don't even know if I've ever had x-rays other than the dentist) but the early diagnosis is that I've torn my meniscus. Joy. The good new is that the ankle portion of the injury is healing nicely and is little more than a pull and bruising.

Of course, I managed to secure extra time off this week but I'm hesitant to go skate in the condition I'm in. Although, if I pop enough ibuprofen and wear a my knee brace, I imagine I'll be OK. The doc did say as long as I didn't try to do a bunch of crazy stuff there's no reason not to skate, well unless it seems to cause more pain actually.

So I think I'm going to take a little drive down to Canon City. It near the Royal Gorge and I've never been there. And there is a skate park there that looks like it could be fun. Plus there should be some good picture taking opportunities.

No matter what I'm just glad not to have to go to work for five days.

Spike'll getcha

For whatever reason that picture of Spike cracks me up. I called it "Spike in a box" over at Flickr. I think part of it is because she seems to have the temperament that she would just jump out of that box and get you if she wanted (although I'm beginning to think that some of that is just an act). Of all the cats she has the raspiest voice. She is also the most demanding when it comes to accessing the bathroom and as she is a princess the toilet should be referred to as a throne in her presence.

I wasn't the biggest cat fan before I met Phrank. Don't get me wrong, I was never a cat hater but I was fairly apathetic to them. Dogs were my domestic animal of choice. But I can see the advantage of cats. And considering that one, if not more of ours act like dogs, I don't even really feel the urge to get a dog right now (that and we can't have them in this apartment complex).

Which isn't to say I wouldn't like a dog but dogs do require a level attention that cats don't. When I come home late at night from work, two of the boys whine until I pick them up. A dog on the other hand would require a walk and perhaps a treat or two just to calm them down. Walking a dog after getting off work is probably not the first thing I'd want to do.

So for now I'll stick to the cats. At least until we move and I make the mistake of walking into the shelter.

Oh yeah, French Toast.

Teh Kewl!!1!

Somewhere in the back of my head I though about typing a whole post in l33t 5p34k but then I decided that the only people who would be able to read it were probably not going to find this little corner of the Internet. I'm sort of surprised that I can read l33t (well as long as it's true l33t and not that obscure l33t stuff), I guess it's mostly from lurking here on the Internet since before the days of AOL. I can only thank the BSU VAX/VMS cluster for that (scary to think that there are a few of you who remember that).

Enough geekery, I'm losing my kewl. What kewl you ask? Yeah, good question. Actually stuff like l33t fascinates me. Being able to witness a major shift in the way the world communicates as I've seen (and to a degree participated) in the last fifteen years or so has been pretty amazing. To watch this new forms of slang and idiom evolve out of the revolutionary changes in communication leaves me with a sense that I'm witness a major change in our evolution of a species (which I realize seems to be a bit of a bold statement but I think future history will back me up on that).

The fact that the letters we used to write that took days if not weeks to be delivered can be retrieved in a matter of moments many times is a big shift. That we can have instantaneous letter like communication through instant messaging software is also a big shift. I don't think we're at the point to know exactly how to use it wisely yet but it is here now and we might as well get used to it.

The wrap up to this is that when I use a typed slang like l33t, somewhere in the back of my mind I'm aware of this amazing shift that we as a species are going through. And in some twisted sense it give me comfort.

Special people

Today was special person day on the phones. Most of the special people were of the "might be riding short bus with the square wheels that go round and round" variety. I may get a bruise on my forehead from too much head-to-desk action but I can deal with these special people (and I think fairly pleasantly (especially when I remember that most people haven't the foggiest when it comes to computers)). But there is a second kind of "special" caller that usually ends in frustration and sometimes a supervisor call for me. I don't have quite a catchy name for them but it has something to do with entitlement and the false premise that the customer is always right.

The company I work for is not an email company. We offer email as a complimentary product that you can choose to use when you sign up with us or as the case with most customers the company previous to us. No matter which company a customer originally had, it was laid out in the Terms of Service that email was for entertainment purposes only and explicitly not for business use (there is a good reason for this and it goes back to the fact that we are not an email provider). As we all know, no one ever reads the TOS (myself included) but it's in there.

Anyway there are a handful of customers that come through that seem to think that the email is more important than their connectivity. Of course these people are the ones who (according to them) their entire livelihood depends on their email address they maintain with us. If email was truly that important to their survival, one would think they would invest a small amount of money into a plan with an email provider instead of our rinky-dink email service that was really designed for grandma and grandpa to get email from the darling granddaughter (who may or may not be named Nikki). It's like asking for Coach leather seats in an Escort. And are these people special, as in their time is more precious that everyone else and they are "model customers that you don't want to loose my business". Here's the thing, in the how many ever years they've had high speed Internet with us, they've never had a problem with it. And they're not calling because they can't get online.

I offer this up: a quick scan of my contacts in my Gmail account list a whole two who use an Internet Service Provider email address (and one is AOL the other is Earthlink). In this day in age there is no reason to be dependent on an ISP provided email address.

Perhaps it's just me. Maybe it's because I've had my Yahoo! email address for over ten years at this point and I don't understand the reason people are beholden to an email address that can change for any number of reasons (moving, canceling or the company selling). I don't get it.

I also don't get why people can get so work up over something they weren't even aware of just a few years ago.

Although I wonder what would happen to me if I had to go more than a day or two without the Internet.

Sufjan Stevens almost made me cry

So I'm sitting here on the floor in the living room and listening to Sufjan Stevens and I find it hard to write anything. Partly because I'm always at a loss of what to write about but mostly because I get lost in his music. Yeah, I know that his music is pretty much on the soft side and can easily be considered wussy music by some. I don't care. I've come to the conclusion that he's probably one of the most talented singer-songwriters and all around musicians creating music.

I know this much that when I listen to one of his albums, it moves me. Some times bordering on tears, other times what I can only describe as a feeling of joy. Beyond that the music has an intricacy resembling a spiderweb (and you can find yourself caught in it). The music doesn't rock but it has this quality to it that I can't put my finger on it.

Sufjan Stevens is from Michigan and there is a strong Midwest feel to his music. I can feel my Indiana roots when I hear his stuff. The fact that his two of his albums are about/entitled Illinois and Michigan is not lost on me as well. Not only that but there are reference to Christian symbols and stories scattered throughout his songs that leave yet another Midwestern feel to the music.

Watch this guy, he's going give us some nice gifts I think.

Go figure...

Well, I did make it to that ditch I had spotted. This time I showed up with a push broom, five gallon bucket and a dustpan with the intention of cleaning it up. Apparently there was a lot more sand in the bottom than I really realized. That and it really doesn't take that much to pile up as I discovered today.

So I managed to clean up the part closest to the road back to the ramp, which you may not be able to tell by the photo but that's a good amount of territory. I go put the broom and stuff away and grab my skateboard because I want to try it out. So what happens when I drop in the first time? Yep, I fall. My front foot stays on the board and my back foot drags and I pull a muscle and twist my ankle a bit. I didn't even manage to get to the steep wall. The thing is I'm not even really that surprised at all. Not that I expected it to happen but it is pretty typical. Oh well, maybe someone will stumble upon it and enjoy it. And I'll probably go back and try to clean the rest of it. Although it's going to take a few trips. So if your driving down south Hancock in Colorado Springs keep you eye out for it.

Oops, I thought it was only a couple of weeks

So I'm going for extended hiatus here. I just checked and it's been over two months since I've put anything up here. Dang. And to think I thought I'd start doing it more in 2007.

I really just haven't had the motivation to write anything here. It's not that there isn't anything happening, I'm just not into the whole recapping it thing. Perhaps it's because I deal with the Internet all day at work.

Speaking of work, I did get a promotion already to what's called Tier 3 tech support. It's a higher level of high speed Internet support and we do the digital phone troubleshooting (it's not VOIP). I'm also learning about the drawbacks of working for a large corporation as a opposed to a small or mom and pop type establishment. The flipside being the pay is really good and a great health insurance plan that allowed me to had Phrank (without going into detail, we had perfect timing getting on the plan). Another bonus is that I don't have to deal with video (or billing) calls if I don't want to. Those video calls are getting transferred out away from me. The only calls I get that escalate into supervisor calls are video calls (I actually had a lady demand a supervisor when I told her that it would cost her 29.95 to have a field tech come to her house and program her TV remote).

A month or so ago I got a new phone that has a camera, that's where the photo came from. What you can't make out is that one of those mountains in the background is Pikes Peak. When I took the pic I was more interested in the colors (and I was surprised how well they came out when I got the pic on my computer).

I did manage to get a closer look at what may be the best ditch to skate around here. It needs a bit of cleanup before I can skate it but it's nothing a push broom can't take care of. I'll try to remember to get a few pictures of it next time I'm out there.

Anyway, I'll try not to let three months go by next time. If there are any of you left that is.

QA

It's like I forget this thing is here it seems. I just looked and it's been a month to the day since the last time I put anything up. And to think that I was going to start doing it some more.

Let's see, we made it through the holidays relatively unscathed but afterwards have been a bit, well, something.

One good thing is I seemed to have settled into a bit of a groove at the call center. Today I had what's called coaching (it's where my supervisor sits me down and goes over how I'm doing). It seems I'm doing fine other than I talk too much. Apparently, I have an ability to calm down most angry customers or at least not let them escalate the calls. Now if the company could get enough people on the phone to keep people from waiting an hour to talk to me.

I still feel sorry for some of them. It's kind of amazing just how much people depend on the Internet now days. Heck even ten years ago it wasn't like this. I was still using dial-up and residential high speed Internet was something that I read about on Usenet. Now the livelihood of people hinge on it (both Phrank and myself wouldn't be doing what we're doing if it weren't for it). Of course most of them accept that there can be disruptions in service and they're the ones who I seem to have the most sympathy.

Completely unrelated, I think I'm ready for winter to end. Or at least the snow to melt all the way out of the bowls at the skate park. For some reason the snow just piles up on the good transitions.