The nights of cruising around on bicycles are quickly coming to an end. It's just getting to be a bit too cold. It can still be done but it requires proper layering at this point. Hoodies are just not warm enough. Bummer, this just means I'm going to have to walk when coming home from the bar. Although soon the free bus will be running later again.
As the nights grow colder, it seems my sense of loneliness grows as well. Not loneliness as in the lack of friends. I have plenty of those. But the lack of a warmer body next to mine while I'm sleeping. Of all the things that I miss about dating that may be one of the parts I miss the most. There is just something about sharing a bed and waking up next to someone that is wonderful. Truly it's been too long for me.
In a matter of days I'll be hitting the two year mark of celibacy (or is it abstinence? I always get those two confused). I really don't know what to think about it. Is it a good thing for me? In a way it is, I hadn't really wanted to get involved with anyone for most of the last two years and I'm too poor to date. Furthermore the thought of a one night stand just doesn't appeal to me that much so I don't even bother trying. I think at this point I'm just confused; on one hand I'm fine being on my own and yet on the other I truly desire the companionship that comes from a relationship. Oh, to be younger and wiser.
Tonight, the thing I think I want the most is just to crawl into bed next to someone and feel their warmth.
3 comments:
my suggestion, get a dog.
...or you could snuggle up with the space heater, but that could be dangerous. Seriously though, I know what you mean, man...there's just nothing like laying in bed with a lovely lass, protecting one another from the cold, cruel world by huddling beneathe blankets and sheets all peaceful and in comfort. I've decided that such a situation in really on of life's rare pleasures which should be appreciated greatly when lucky enough to be within the experience.
"celibacy (or is it abstinence? I always get those two confused)."
---I think they're essentially the same, and neither applies to your situation. I'm pretty sure both of those terms refer to not having sex by choice.
"on one hand I'm fine being on my own"
---You may not have intended, but there's a great pun in there. I'm fine on my own with one hand too. What does a guy with no hands do on his own?
I'm not trying to be cruel, just funny. Unfortunately, I fail.
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